Podcast Episode #122: The Next Version of You.
Who is that next version of you? Introduce yourself….and observe what she is doing, how she dresses, how she handles her money, how she spend her time and with whom she shares her life?
Let’s explore that next- even better- version of ourselves.
Welcome everyone, I’m Sharri Harmel, host of the EW podcast, as well as the Founder and editor of the EW magazine, blog and private FB group. The EW Magazine group is solely focused on supporting women like you design, create and live a fabulous next chapter.
Let’s get started by talking with that women who is the next best version of you.
First question- how does she dress?
Now, most of the time when someone asks that question you think of what you wear to parties or gatherings out with friends…but I’m asking…how does she dress When she’s running errands? When she’s standing on the sidelines of her kids or grandkids sports games? When she’s getting on zoom for a call or a podcast? When she’s going out for dinner with friends?
If you’re like me, you do well when you’re seen by your community on SM or zoom or when you have a specific event like a lunch or coffee meeting. We dress up, we pay attention to our makeup, choose jewelry, etc. But what about those every day errands, popping into the drug store or
picking up groceries?
Now in Paris…there isn’t a huge difference for me. I dress the same way whether I’m on zoom or going to the boulangerie. That is so much a part of the Parisian culture. But in America, it is a different story and especially when it is cold outside or raining. It is actually difficult to find pretty umbrellas in many places because we are a car culture- people run from their cars to the
office or shop if it’s raining. And the cold can be even worse.
Puffer coats were a fantastic invention, but as we all know, we can hide that we are wearing pajamas under those coats. So, my next version of me- dresses with care every day regardless of what she has planned or the weather.
Why?
Because how you dress…whether or not you feel like you spent time with your
appearance, makes all the difference in how you will feel about yourself and the world around you. When I spend no time on my appearance, do not put on the lipstick, do not wear a pretty coat and scarf when it’s cold out- I’ve truly accepted invisibility or lack of being seen. When that happens, we focus just on the job to be done- dropping off the package, picking up the spaghetti sauce or eggs and often multitask with no thought for our appearance.
Spending an entire day in exercise clothes doesn’t make anyone feel pretty or special. Our new better version of ourself – is going to slow down and take more care with our appearance.
Yes, bodies change over time but instead of buying bigger to cover up new flaws, why not find a good tailor. Having your dresses or shirts nipped in at the waist can make all the difference especially if you are like me and have found your waist disappearing.
And how can you add pretty to a black puffer coat? Scarves can make all the difference, actually to every outfit. The French figured that out decades ago- so try it out. Buy several really beautiful scarves- some for warmth and some for beauty.
Next question – How does she handle her money?
The next version of YOU is really, really good with money. Investments AND budgeting…the little things that add up every month. It’s not just about making more money, but what you do with the money you have. Remember, there are two sides to a balance sheet!
What if you took a break from shopping? I recently went through my clothes closets and found so many pieces I had forgotten I have. Some even still had the tags on them! So for one month, I’m going to not purchase anything I don’t need…let’s all try it and see how we feel.
Also, go through your closets and do a clearing. If you have nice pieces you don’t want to donate, consider taking them to a local consignment shop. I have sold so much clothing and décor items and even furniture in consignment shops. Getting that check in the mail feels like a win!
On that same topic…Look through you 2022 expenses to see if there are specific areas of weaknesses that you could change.
For me it’s the impulse purchases that have anything to do with my skin or good books. If someone writes that a skin care product did amazing things with their skin, I’m ready to hit the purchase button. Months later I’ll see the product in my cabinet and have no idea why I purchased it.
Books. Amazon should have a program for their diamond shoppers…because that would be me. I love books….I love to read and I have trouble giving away books I love. Unless you own a home large enough for a library, which I don’t, this is an expensive problem. So my new plan is to keep a running list of books I want to read on Amazon and purchase only what I can read in a few weeks.
What has gone up most during our inflationary times? Besides food and clothing…services have gone sky high and there is talk that they might never come down. Ubers are twice the cost of before the pandemic, eating out has become super expensive and frankly, the quality of the food has gone down in both Boston and Paris. We now tip far more than we did
before, primarily because there is a labor shortage everywhere, and we
want those that are working to keep working.
Ask yourself what can you control?
It might be doing more cooking…and if you live solo…freezing meals. Walk more…trying mass transit… or be more planful when you get in the car. I was determined to learn more bus routes in Paris and I’m going to get on the silver line in Boston if it’s the last thing I do in the Seaport.
Next on the topic of our money…Think about your investments.
Do you have the best team to help manage your investments? Retirements are changing investment teams, so it’s time to check in who is running the team and what are their qualifications? I recently changed because the lead investment advisor on my team retired and her successor although is a great financial planner, is not an investment analyst. The people she added to this team were more generalists- great planning skills but no one with investment training or experience. We are going through much more difficult investing times than the last decade and that is going to require much more than financial planning.
As for your retirement plans? The next version of you is a woman who is on top of her money and that includes that 401K that previously you might only look at once a year. Dive into the funds that your retirement plan is invested in- who is running it? Has there been changes? What does it invest in? Does the focus of the fund fit the economic times we are now in?
What about taxes? If you are pushing up against a higher tax bracket? If so, could an increase in your 401K contribution keep you below that next bracket upcharge? That next version of you would much rather add to her long-term security than pay more taxes.
Next question – How does she feel about herself and the world around
her?
I have a confession to make. I got into watching YouTube videos during covid – and that has almost replaced regular television. My current addiction is trying to stay on top of the coming woes of the economy and believe it or not, the Harry and Meghan saga. Gads…negative, negative video input going into my brain on a regular basis.
One day, I said to myself- girl, you need to change this up! I still love YouTube, but I switched to watching more home decorating videos, and added Louise Hay and other uplifting, inspiring stories. Suddenly I was sleeping better and feeling more positive about the
world. So, that saying “you are the average of the 5 people you spend the
most time with” actually includes what you watch…
In a recent CBS Sunday morning series, David Pogue did a segment called Good News you missed in 2022. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jw_mjPbtt3c
Here is a sample…20 years ago, clean energy provided about 8% of US power. This year that number is over 38%. And of all the new power capacity we built this year…81% of it runs on renewable power. Good news makes us feel optimistic. Therefore that next version of you- will guard what she chooses to spend her time doing and watching because she knows that affects how she thinks about the world…and her role in the world.
That next version of you plans out at least one yearly adventure…
The next version of you doesn’t have an ever-growing bucket list that stays in a drawer. If it’s travel to somewhere…then by better managing your money, you might be able to make one thing on that list happen.
I’ve got two trips planned in 2023 and both are with people I met in 2022 who invited me on special trips for the upcoming year. My bucket list includes people and places…so this is perfect.
One of the trips is to a more remote area of France, and I have to figure out how to get there. Nerve-wracking yes, but I know that stretching myself grows my self – confidence.
If it’s starting that business you’ve always dreamed of- talk to others in that space and figure out your first next steps. And that next version of you- is a self-confident woman. To be truly self-confident you have to stretch yourself. It’s easy to be confident if you stay in your same neighborhood, never get on a plane, only dream about the business you want to start, and surround yourself with like- minded people. But I call that fake confidence or situational confidence.
Real self-confidence comes from knowing that you’ll be okay no matter what you face because you have a bank of experiences you’ve already worked through… all those challenges you’ve already faced and conquered.
Keeping our lives small and safe might on the surface feel good, but ultimately choosing small and safe will create insecurity and confidence. That little voice inside your head will start to question your ability to handle anything outside of the neighborhood or the routine and that can create not so fabulous behaviors.
The next version of you wants a bigger life…more expansive emotions…security and yet more adventure. More confidence and comfort with trying new things and meeting new people.
That next version of you wants that real confidence that comes from knowing you can manage everything that happens- good and bad- with grace, humility, courage and competence.
Let’s all introduce ourselves to the next even better- version of ourselves.
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into our next chapters, but instead design a fabulous one. Inside the EW magazine there are articles on side hustles, travel, style, relationships as well as the all-important self-care.
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I look forward to seeing you soon….a bientot.
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