Extraordinary Women Blog #6 – Taking Care of Moi!
It’s always something isn’t it?
If we haven’t had enough stress, now it’s the heat wave that seems to be everywhere!
Inflation, possible recession, covid still around, climate concerns, lack of governmental leadership, lost luggage, cancelled flights…. When does it end? Don’t ask me…. I’m clueless.
Because of all this stress, I thought it was the perfect time to talk about ways we can proactively take care of ourselves AND feel happy in the middle of all the stresses we are each carrying right now.
Conversations with Strangers
I share this because I have found that talking to strangers is THE most effective way to get out of our heads and all the negative events happening in the world around us. I believe that conversations with strangers actually works better than talking with good friends and family.
A few examples….
This morning, I hopped into an uber car heading to my dentist appointment and totally in my own head. I had just finished reading the newspaper and totally stressed out about the economy, upcoming travel plans and even potential pain from my dental work.
I’m anxious right now … about everything.
My Uber driver though, was very outgoing and shared with me that he could write a book telling the stories of the people who get his car. He obviously needed to talk so I listened. The client he drove before me was a woman he picked up at the airport. He shared that the woman had a panic attack in his car when they got stuck in a traffic jam in one of the tunnels here in Boston. He shared how at first, he thought, gads, I’ve picked up a doozy … but after she was able to calm herself with the aid of her service dog, she shared that she struggles with tunnels ever since 9/11. My driver said he didn’t want to ask what happened, and we continued to have this lovely conversation how we never know what stories and traumas people carry around with them every day. And, yet how we often judge people based on their today behaviors, without the backstory.
In my 15-minute uber ride, my head was in a different place when I walked into the dental office.
After the dentist, I dropped off a couple of old tablecloths with a new tailor I found. I needed them to be made smaller because my Boston dining table is small. Now I am no tailor…and had taken just these two tablecloths and cut off the ends to fit my new table. As I explained I wanted the tablecloths hemmed and turned into ovals, the tailor was trying to hold back his review of my cuttings. Very few people have poker faces! Then when I said “Obviously, based on my skill set, you would never hire me!” he burst out laughing. We had a lovely little conversation about the tablecloths and both of us had smiles on our faces when I left his atelier.
Arriving back at my building, I greeted the team at the front desk, and we all smiled and laughed as we made comments about the hot and humid Boston weather today.
Talking to strangers gets us out of our heads, out of our agendas! We need to talk to strangers!! And they need to talk to us!! Those are the conversations we all missed having during covid and got a little stuck in our heads with the weight of our thoughts.
In contrast, when I talk to good friends or family, we feel safe talking about what worries us… the impact of inflation, the distressing state of America, our medical system, health problems, education issues resulting from two years of lost in-person classes and more.
We all need that too, but on a day-to-day basis, we need interactions with people that are lighter, a few jokes shared, smiles over the weather, laughing over a dog’s refusal to go outside when it’s hot… etc.
We need that lightness that conversations with strangers can share with us.
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Watch Shows and Movies that make you laugh!
I watched Mrs. ‘Arris Goes to Paris with Angela Lansbury before the new version comes out. Yes, it seems totally impossible that a cleaner could ever save enough money to purchase a Dior ball dress, and yet, the movie was lovely. It had the perfect message about the importance of holding onto our dreams and working towards our dreams. I loved it.
The Vicar of Dibley – OMG, who doesn’t laugh when Dawn French is on the screen? Anything she does will make you laugh.
The Golden Girls – Yep, the oldies!! Sophia, the oldest of the group and mother of Dorothy is absolutely hysterical!
The Graham Norton Show, which you can get on YouTube. Wet your pants funny!
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Listen to Podcasts that make you feel good
I need podcasts that make me excited and happy. There are so so many that are on heavy topics. I just can’t listen to them anymore. Yes, we need to be informed and aware, but right now we each need to take care of moi…. you. If you aren’t happy, nothing around you will work.
Since I’ve added guests to the Extraordinary Women podcast, I find I’m loving hearing the stories of my guests and every single one of them inspires me. Bringing on guests has made my podcast much more interesting to me! And hopefully you!!
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Listen to Beth Djalali (Episode 83) talk about Style at A Certain Age…. she has built an amazing business that she started when she was 50 years old. (Link) It’s never too late to get going on YOUR dream!
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Listen to Sharon Saraga-Walters (Episode 95) talk about her book Graticise 365, and why gratitude changes our mindset. (Link)
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Listen to My Conversation titled Chasing Happiness… (Episode 52) Tips and tricks to help you to stay on the path of feeling happy.
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Read Happy Books
Recently, I read The Golden Couple for one of my book clubs. It’s a psychological thriller and although it was good, it made me a little nuts. I questioned all the motives of the characters in the book, which seeped out into the people in my life!
If we come at everything with the negative belief that there is something sinister going on, life will be living hell. I know because I watched what happened to my thoughts the week, I was reading the book!
Find the happy books, the inspiring books. Don’t be embarrassed to pick up a beach read, chic lit, whatever you want to call it. If you love mysteries, check out the Massie Dobbs books, which are super fun and thought-provoking books that take place in London. I also love the Martin Walker’s books on Bruno, the police chief in France.
Buy tabletop books- two of my favorite designers are Charlotte Moss and Kit Kemp. Dive into those books before you go to sleep at night…imagine what you could create!
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