Welcome to the 52nd episode of this podcast!! I cannot believe it’s been one year of writing and recording my weekly podcast. I so very much hope that you’ve enjoyed spending time with me over the past year – let’s just keep going, right? 

Fall if my favorite time of the year. In France, they call it Rentrée- which so perfectly describes the season. It’s the end of unstructured summer months of long days and a re-entry into the structure of school and work – both are filled with major uncertainty given covid, that aside, I like to refer to fall as the new year…

Because Fall is actually much more of a new year, new beginning shifts than January 1st ever is. 

Like every new year reset, this is when we ask ourselves the hard questions and my question this week is how can I feel happier? 

I want to feel happy. Not just a little happy, but I want my happiness cup to be overflowing. 

But ladies, happiness doesn’t come easily to me. Some of you might be able to relate. 

I’ve experienced loads of loss in my life, and that’s a heavy weight to carry around and still feel happiness. I’ve made mistakes and wrong choices. If I let myself, I could dwell in the place of what my life could have been if I had made different choices and took better care of myself. 

So, ladies, if I don’t work on being happy, I’ll get stuck in regret-land. Maybe you know exactly what I’m talking about… 

But why is being happy important? First, because I love having dreams and making them come true, I’ve learned that happiness trumps every other variable when it comes to making dreams happen. No matter what your dream is, when you’re not happy it probably means you’re focusing on something else, and therefore the dream doesn’t happen.  But the more I’ve studied happiness, I’ve learned happiness creates all kinds of special effects in your life, like living longer because stress, which is a byproduct of unhappiness, eats away at our bodies. 

Research shows us that when people are happy, they have fewer strokes and heart attacks, less inflammation, greater immune function. And that’s just the effects on the body!

Research also shows us that happy people have better work performance, have larger social spheres, are financially more successful, and handle adversity better. 

Gosh,I want ALL of that! And I’m sure you do too. 

It all makes sense when we think of the behaviors we engage in when we are feeling desperately unhappy. 

We buy things like clothes, shoes, or even houses because we’re sure that we’ll be happier if we have what it is we are buying. Buying stuff is only one unhealthy habit that appears when we’re unhappy. Oh no, there are others … No happy person eats a bag of jellybeans in one sitting, which I have been known to do. Happy people don’t hit the snooze button multiple times in the morning or want to nap all day long. 

In all of these unhappy habits, you get a momentary hit of happiness or what you think is happiness, and then bam, you’re back where you were and maybe wonder why you don’t feel happier. 

What I didn’t share, and this is big, research makes it very clear that “greater states of happiness precede all the positive outcomes.” 

So, the belief that “once I lose the weight” or “once I find the man” or “once I have the house or the job – THEN I’ll be happy”- is totally backwards!

Work on our happiness and then all those wonderful things we desire in life including our dreams will begin to happen. 

But how the heck do we work on our happiness if it’s not about anything buying something or achieving something?? 

And if happiness is what we do right now that leads to us getting what we really want, how do we start?

I’m a bit of a negative Nellie and maybe you are too so when I got to this point in the research, I hypothetically crossed my arms and said, “Show me how.” 

I pulled out Shawn Anchor’s book, The Happiness Advantage. Shawn says we start by developing Happy Habits. I love that phrase by the way…. I want to have happy habits. 

Here they are: 

1. Each morning write down three NEW things you’re grateful for and it can’t be the same three every day. Why? You’re training your brain to look for positive things that are in your life. 
2. Journal for two minutes each day about one positive experience you’ve had over the past 24 hours. Shawn’s directions are to write down every detail you can remember. What happens is that your brain starts to re-experience the positive experience. It’s like a replay of that experience in your mind. 
3. Meditate Daily. This doesn’t even have to be very long- a few minutes. Focus on your breath going in and out, your body in the chair, relaxing and shutting down everything around you. You are in essence training your brain to focus exactly where you want it to focus and not be so easily distracted. 
4. Do a random act of kindness over the course of each day.  Thank someone, send someone you care about a nice email, smile at a stranger. It doesn’t have to be big just kind. 
5. Exercise for 15 minutes each day. Go for a quick walk, get the heart rate going a little- it’s just for 15 minutes but research has shown that exercise works like an anti-depressant and the effects can last longer than a pharmaceutical anti-depressant!

If you noticed, every single one of these happy habits are about retraining your brain. Call it what you like like mindset, attitude, state of thinking, our brains are super powerful AND we alone are in charge of what our brains think about. We are the programmers of this amazing organ of ours.  

So, I’m on eight of this routine. I think I’m noticing little differences already. I find it easier to shift my thinking when I have quickly dismissed something as not good or I couldn’t possibly do that for a day multitude of reasons.

Here’s an example … I was contacted this past week by a nation-wide radio show, actually worldwide, asking me if I’d consider being a guest on their show. I almost peed in my pants.           For a few seconds I thought, me? Are you kidding? Why in the world would anyone be interested in interviewing me? Then I thought why not? 

I had a long conversation with the executive producer of the show, and they want to interview me because they love the idea of my magazine. They love the idea that I started a magazine for women and had the audacity to call it extraordinary women! Can you believe it?? 

I share this because it had only been four days into my happy habits, but something inside me had already started to shift. I believe it’s because I’m filling up my happiness cup every day with my new happy habits. 

So, try on these happy habits for yourself and share what is different about you. I’d love to hear your stories as we all embrace happy habits. 

Outro 

I can’t wait to hear what changes for you as you embrace happy habits. Let’s focus first on mindset, how you feel each day, your attitude as you go through the day. Please do share.   

Now if you enjoyed this podcast, then I know you’ll love Extraordinary Women Magazine. 

I named the magazine Extraordinary Women because every issue has interviews with at least two extraordinary women who will probably remind you a little of yourself because you too are an Extraordinary woman. Try that label on!

The magazine is a dream supporting, dream inspiring magazine that I know you’ll love. It’s got ideas, recipes, and lifestyle suggestions meant to give you hope and encouragement, which we all need more of today. The magazine is actually another happy habit!!

We now have two wonderful contributing writers- Michele LeMaitre, who is an incredible artist and she’ll be writing about the life and business of an artist. 

And Sara Griot, a lovely stylist who will be giving us all great style suggestions that help us to feel pretty and pulled together regardless of our ages, body types and lifestyles. It’s fall and I can’t wait for Sara’s updates as our weather changes. 

Also, there is My Parisienne Attitude section. I’ll be back in my Paris apartment mid-October and I’m learning that part of the French joie de vivre is actually about embracing happy habits!

Married or solo, kids grown or still at home. Corporate careers, entrepreneurs, a stay-at-home mother or even retired, this magazine is meant to be like your best friend who appreciates you, encourages you and inspires you to find that secret to happiness. 

Join us by the subscribe button HERE or check out my Instagram page! Nothing complicated. Just clicking good stories, a little inspiration, and a cup of hope. 

Thank you and as I say to my friends and neighbors in Paris – À Bientôt! 

 

Did you enjoy this episode?

• Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes, Google or Spotify.

• Please leave a review in iTunes.

• Be sure to leave your comments below.