Podcast Episode 44: What’s Next? I Haven’t a Clue….

Anyone else feel like this? Is the uncertainty of everything sort of swirling around you?

I’ve had some big accomplishments this past year, I’m sure you have too, but I’m unsettled, a bit preoccupied all because I can’t figure out what’s next in my life. Are any of you feeling that same way? Pop into the FB group and share. It’s always great to know we’re not alone, especially when we’re struggling with something.

So back to the question of what’s next? What is it I really want to do? I have lots of ideas, in fact maybe too many ideas because but I can’t seem to decide what is next for me, especially in my career.

I need to grow my magazine but how? I need to grow my podcast, but how? I want to have more fun in my life, but how?

Checking in with myself, I realized a big part of what I’m missing is my need to be with people, feel the energy of a room or a building, smell the ocean or a forest, or even food from the table next to me. I’ve decided there’s a new diagnosis out there and I have it – I’m suffering from sensory boredom.

I think this sensory boredom is contributing to my inability to figure out what’s next. For far too long, my senses have primarily experienced what goes on in my own home and maybe because I live solo, I’m really, really tired of me. I want to be around other people who are doing things, having conversations, and eating things that I’m not a part of …. I want to be IN the world instead of an observer OF the world!!

Never in a million years did this introvert think I’d feel this way.

So, what is one of the ideas that came up for me in my what’s next journey? Hosting some sort of women’s retreat in France maybe in 2022 or 2023, because I love France. Maybe a retreat for coaches who are trying to figure out a profitable business plan.

I love helping people get clarity but what’s going on with all these crazy ideas?

Well, this idea of a retreat came out of me playing my “Let’s Pretend” game.

This is the game I play to pull out all the ideas that are swirling around in my head.

Let’s Pretend is a game you play with yourself – you’re going to let yourself imagine every crazy, fabulous possibility for something you create or do. I don’t call it brainstorming because it’s so easy to filter when you brainstorm.

You want to play “Let’s Pretend” as if you were a child again – when anything and everything was possible! Heck, when I played this game as a child, I was going to be like Laura in the Little House books, and then Madame Curie, then find my kingdom because I must be a princess for sure, and then run my own grocery store! Let’s Pretend was a joy to play when we were kids, and it can be today too.

So, pull out your wand, put on your crown, crawl into your tent, and begin.

Connecting with my sensory boredom, I started coming up with ways for me to be around people, do my work in the presence of people.

Remember, some of the craziest ideas are the BEST ideas so let yourself go wild.

When I did, all those retreat ideas came up? For the sake of time, I’ll focus today on the Retreat in France option.

When you play, Let’s pretend…. you’re participating…. You’re IN the activity, you’re not just watching it. I was hosting my retreat in France….

Provence is beautiful but I’m feeling super-hot because it’s summer. I walk over to the Loire Valley and it’s gorgeous but a little isolated.
Do I like the chateau I’m staying in? Could I rent it for a retreat?
How many people would I want to attend? How many bedrooms will I need and is there a hotel nearby for over-flow….
Who are the people I could partner with? Sara Griot- the Stylist, Michele LeMaitre – the artist? They’d be great fun to work with.
What activities could I offer at this retreat? Is there a space in the château for yoga? Photography? Are we going on a little brocante visit? Enjoying Wine tasting or a cooking class?

See how when you play Let’s Pretend, the ideas flow….

Once you feel you have enough…. you’ve emptied your brain of ideas, at least for the moment, the next step is to look for connections or combinations between your Let’s Pretend ideas.

For example, when I connected my need for sensory stimulation with my business, the retreat idea was born.

You’ll have lots of combinations- but start with one.

I began with the idea of doing a retreat and does location even matter? Would doing a retreat in Boston have the same appeal? No was the answer. I got a very clear message in my body that I must combine my two passions of travel with the retreat idea, so I then focused on the retreat in France idea. This is important, because some combinations will get tossed right away.

You’ve got on option you want to explore. The next step is to decide whether or not one of your crazy ideas is viable and the only way to work that out is to focus in on the questions you now have around your “let’s pretend” idea.

For my women’s retreat in France idea … here are the questions I’m wondering…

What time of year is best?

What’s the optimal number of ladies at my retreat?

How will I structure the retreat, what’s will be the focus?

What will be my primary costs?

Do I partner or not?

The list goes on ….

The next step is to get answers to those questions …. And how do I do that?

Talk to people who have done retreats!!

Talking with people will be your number one priority in answering your questions.

Talk to as many people you can who are doing what you are exploring for yourself. I call this research.

Don’t let that word freak you out. Research in this context is just talking to people who are actually doing what you think you want to do … and asking them questions.

You want to know their challenges, their concerns going forward, the trends, what they love about whatever it is you’re exploring…. Don’t be afraid. I find most people are flattered you ask them to share their path and perspective with you. What you learn from these conversations is invaluable for you to figure out if that dream is a good fit for the woman, you are- or just a fantasy.

Let’s say you want to explore starting a coaching business. Interview people who have successful coaching businesses. Why did they choose to be a coach? What was their path to coaching? How did they find their niche? How does coaching fit in with their life? What are the challenges they experience?

You’ll take what you learn from each and every interview and then apply it to what you know about yourself.

And the only way this final step works is if you are real and honest with yourself and that means you have to know you – the Real You. No pretending, no external approval. Just you and what YOU want … and ladies, listen to any quick hits of intuition that you get in this entire process. That is your wise self-talking to you!

I hope you can now see how a little game called Let’s pretend can help you to find the direction you are seeking when you feel uncertain and stuck in what’s next.

So, play let’s pretend, come up your questions and then talk to as many people as you can about what is it that you think you want next in your life. Hopefully that process starts to bring you more than a little bit of clarity around What’s Next.

And for ongoing and amazing support, I invite you to subscribe to the Be the Real You Magazine. Go to sharriharmel.com. The magazine comes out 4 times/year and we just published issue #2. I heard from my readers how much they love seeing it appear in their inbox.

ALSO, I hope you take the time to rate this podcast. Podcasts are free, so what matters to huge platforms like iTunes, is whether you like the podcast. So, I invite you to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. We have a little giveaway going on for those that review the podcast. It’s a surprise but one I’m sure you’ll love!

Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media button on this page.

Take care and see you soon.

Bon Journée!