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Officially, I use the title of Life Coach, but what does that mean? Life Coach is so broad that it almost becomes meaningless.

The other day I said to a colleague, I should just call myself a Possibilities Coach, because that is really how I work and live. My own true nature is to be in the world of possibilities and identify the process to make decisions about possibilities.

But let’s go back for a minute. 

What are possibilities?

Are they just dreams or ideas or even fantasies of how life would be if certain events happen?

For example, is winning the lottery a possibility? Or inheriting a Parisian apartment from some unknown relative? 

No. However wonderful those two examples are, they are fantasies not possibilities.

Possibilities by definition, have to be possible. Therefore, there is a little bit of probability built into possibilities AND there has to be a process of how to get there.

The lottery win for example, just happens if you purchase the winning ticket. There is no process involved other than buying that ticket.

Therefore, Possibilities require a process – and that process is what will help you to see and feel the likelihood of the possibility as well as whether or not it fits with your life goals.

That process is what I often work on with my coaching clients.

Let me give you an example.

A few years ago, I had a client who dreamed of leaving her corporate job and starting her own business. She had been in the product development industry for a long time, but always within a corporate structure.

She had all sorts of dreams of what her life would be like as an entrepreneur. She saw flexible hours, creating her own schedule, more time with her kids and partner, and the freedom to create products that truly interested her.

Was this a possibility? Absolutely.

But she needed help to delve into the process of what owning her own business would be like to actually determine if that possibility was actually a good fit.

In that process, she learned what the life of an entrepreneur is very different in the early years.  After many interviews with entrepreneurs who had launched businesses, it quickly became apparent to her that her life at the beginning of the launch of her business would be incredibly intense, hugely time-consuming and quite different from what it might be like five years out.

We also explored her personality, her strengths, and what she enjoyed doing.  As an entrepreneur, she realized she’d be responsible for all aspects of her company rather than just the product development area and she wasn’t so sure she’d like that.

Finally, she asked herself, how would the process of starting and growing her business fit with her primary goals to spend more time with her children while they were still young.

Her conclusion after months of working together, was that now was not the time for her to launch her own business.  She learned she’d end up having even less time with her girls while she got that company idea off the ground.

Plus, she realized she loved bouncing ideas off colleagues, she got energy from those sessions, and felt that interaction with people nurtured her creative spirit. Something she’d initially lose especially as a solopreneur.

Instead, my client decided to discuss options within her current corporate environment to see if  there was a way to have more time flexibility so she could spend more time with her daughters. She also committed to exploring outside opportunities and ideas she had for new products.

So, my client identified a possibility, and then went  through the process of learning more about the life of an early entrepreneur was going to be like, which ended up helping her decide that launching a new business didn’t fit with her life goals at this time.

Possibilities DO need a process to clarify whether or not the possibility is actually a good fit for you and your bigger life goals and vision.

Well, Possibilities to Process is actually my sweet spot.

When I was about six or seven years old, the food industry introduced coupons. They had not really figured out how their process was going to work, so in the beginning you didn’t have to purchase the product, and each coupon was worth money, maybe 5 or 10 cents. (Today of course, you have to purchase the product.)

As a child, I loved to grocery shop with my father, and I saw how people received money for coupons.

I had my possibility!  If I had a coupon, I’d get money.

But I needed a process to obtain the coupons!

At that time, there was an abundance of magazines geared towards women and they were where the food companies put the coupons for grocery items. But how could I get my hands on magazines? Well, my grandmother bought magazines.

Bingo. I had my process.

I quickly acquired the nickname of “the coupon clipper” in my family and neighborhood because I relentlessly searched for magazines that still had coupons inside that I could redeem for money.

Well, my little business went on for a couple of years until my father realized how much money I was making and decided I needed to share it with my siblings.

But the real change for my business, was when the food companies realized their mistake and required people to purchase the product to use the coupon. I guess you could say that at 8 years old, I had my first entrepreneurial win and subsequent failure.

The point is that possibilities and process come naturally to me. I was a little kid and yet I could see all the steps needed to put some candy money in my pocket and I clearly saw the process I would need to take to make the money. 

Actually, this ability to see process and possibilities is what makes me a good coach.

So, what is on YOUR possibilities brainstorming list?

Is it to find a little more balance in your life…write a book… embracing a new and nurturing lifestyle? Is it to create a new life after a divorce? Do You have a business idea you want to pursue?

Take each of YOUR possibilities and start to build out and then work the process to figure out if that possibility is what you really want. 

It is the process that will help you to decide whether or not you need or even want to make that possibility happen.

As an example, let’s use creating a new life after a divorce. 

You might have a long list of ideas to build your new life as a single woman, here are a few I often hear.

A different and healthier eating plan. You might have used junk food to get you through the divorce process, but now you want to rid yourself of that habit and ultimately become a vegetarian. The process is to start to look at vegetarian recipes and lifestyle blogs. What foods do I need to incorporate into my diet, are there any kitchen equipment I’ll need as a vegetarian. Try out a few. See how you feel…

I often hear newly divorced women share that they want a new hobby to pursue something they are interested in and to meet a new community. For example, I love birds. My desk faces a window so year-round I’m able to watch birds. I started to explore what birding was all about. I learned that to be a birder, you have to be a pretty good hiker. Well, that’s great because I need more exercise. This is like exercise with a plan! In the meantime, I’m reading online blogs to learn more about what it means to be a birder and whether or not that community has any of my peeps.  All part of the process…

Another goal I often hear from many divorced women is to gain more confidence with money.  Maybe it is to dive deeper into your retirement planning, decide if whether to keep the family home, and if you don’t, where do you go. Most often, I hear the desire to learn how to better budget. For women, money is not just numbers, it’s also a huge mindset issue. We talk about how you ultimately want to feel about your money, your beliefs around money, and much more. Often, a lack of confidence is tied to a lack of knowledge, so where are your money knowledge gaps, and how can you close the gap by learning more.

I hope you all now see that process involves learning more about what you THINK you want in order to determine IF you really want it. 

You might think you want a home with a yard, but decide you want to travel more and therefore shutting the door to your condo with the freedom to hop on a plane is much more important to you.

So, please do share in our FB group. We want to hear about your possibilities list and what will be your first process steps to decide whether that possibility stays on your list.

I also want to share that my Mindset to Joie de Vivre course is coming out in early 2021. Mindset is the key to whether you’ll jump in and make your possibilities happen and get started on your process or stay stuck in the someday mindset.

If you want to join my waitlist for the Mindset to Joie de Vivre course, go to Sharriharmel.com and hit the button to join the course waitlist. That way you’ll get all the new and updated information about the course, plus we’ll be having a couple of free webinars prior to the course beginning so you can get an idea of what the course is all about. +John- link this to the waitlist button on Course page. 

In the meantime, stay healthy, be happy, and keep exploring your possibilities list.

À Bientôt.

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